Blah Blah for a Full Decade!

I just got this:

10 Year Anniversary Achievement
Happy Anniversary with WordPress.com!

You registered on WordPress.com 10 years ago.

Thanks for flying with us. Keep up the good blogging.

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Yikes! Before that I blogged with amagama.com from May 2001 – they went belly up.
Hey, not because of  me!
I managed to rescue a few of my posts thanks to the wayback machine but many were lost forever.
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Here’s an oldie from early wordpress days:

So who’s actually the baker here?

Mom n Tom choose a cake for his party: A great big rocket with a number SEVEN emblazoned in smarties on its side, a star-shaped base and gleaming red aluminium foil cone and fins. They choose the mixing bowl, run the Kenwood, prepare the star-shaped pan and – at last – pop the first part into the pre-heated oven.

It’s a hot, muggy day and Aitch plops down into a chair in the breakfast nook and smiles at Tom.

Mom! he says, I couldn’t have done that without you!

tommy@giba gorge.co.za004

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It gets worse. Later on he thinks of something and goes up to Aitch.

Mom, what treat can I get for helping you? he asks.

Hmmm, says Aitch. Who’s cake is this?

Mine.

So what do I get for helping YOU?

A hearty handshake, says the incorrigible one, without missing a beat.

Green Cheese

A well-known tactic of the name-remembering incompetent is to use one ‘name’ for everyone when you can’t remember their names. In the sixties Uncle Jack Kemp used to call everyone ‘Cock’. ‘Hello Cock!’ he’d say and you could see his mind racing: Just WHO is this again? I mean, I know him but what’s his name again?! ‘How’re you Cock?’ In the eighties Peppy Peeperkorn, a delightful nurse friend at Addington Hospital when I was sentenced to live there by the army used to call everyone ‘Chicken Legs’! ‘Hey, Chicken Legs! What you doin’?’

So I made the mistake of asking Tom after one of his home school lessons: ‘What did old Green Cheese teach you today?’ He cracked up and has called his tutor Green Cheese ever since, my protests and explanation and Hey, you don’t DO that! falling on delighted deaf ears.

This morning I overheard him as he walked in to start his lesson “Hey! That’s my chair! It’s made for my arse, not an old Green Cheese arse!’

He should get a klap on his ear from his older, bigger, cleverer, more capable, more focused third year economics student tutor, but instead – as so often with Tom – he gets away with it.

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Ninety in the Shade!

Four generations and friends met at Mom’s house to celebrate her 90th today.

It was an all-day affair that included morning tea and lunch. Even when I got there after two there was cake and cheese and biscuits and olives and chips n dips, coffee and tea. Then champagne and sherry. Mom had to forego her nap!

In the sepia photo, Mom n Dad, three kids, a grandkid and two great-grandkids.

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A’s and Oy!s

You’ve heard all those “Rich People’s Problems” jokes?
Today (this was in 2016) I heard a big “Indian People’s Problem”.

Went to Italtile to fetch yet another farking expensive something or other. This time tile mosaic for Tom’s shower floor. R990 just to cut it – tile price excluded.

So my saleslady says “How’s Tommy?” – she’s been planning “Tommy’s Bathroom” and “Jessie’s Bathroom” the last weeks, so she’s an old hand.

I say (mistake – should have stuck to the tried-and-tested “fine thanks”):

“He’s battling at school. It’s exam time, and he’s not interested in studying”.

“I KNOW!!” she exclaims “My 13yr old son is THE SAME! He came back from these exams with two B’s! He dropped his “all A’s” just because he won’t learn. I TOLE him: “You won’t get anywhere if you don’t shine up!”

I’m a diplomat. One who would give his left leg for two B’s. I jis nodded.

Lab Report

Approaching her 84th dog-year birthday Sambucca started with a red eye which started to bulge. This followed a long slow period in which she went grey, then white, then hard-of-hearing, then hard-of-seeing. She’s still full of beans and has a robust appetite, but the intermittent bulging red eye was not normal. A trip to the vet was called for. Between making the appointment and going the old duck clocked 84. Twelve calendar years. Born 23 August 2006. It says so on her papers from The Kennel Club. ‘Jena’ born out of ‘Yellow Daisy’ by ‘ZinZan Kilgobbin’.

‘Strue. She’s our first non-brak. Amazing. I always thought she was 12% greyhound judging from her sprint round the trailer when I get home evenings.

Tobias rounded her up, so she thought AHA! I know him, he wants to shampoo me! To avoid him she leapt into the back seat of the Ranger like a teenager. Tobias just grinned, mission accomplished! Jess accompanied me and even though old Sam very seldom gets a ride she was a star on her dog mat in the back seat; calm, unfussed.

We also had best behaviour at the vet except when an intruder – an inferior golden labrador – dared to leave the consulting room and cross the waiting room floor. How dare it come to the vet on a black labrador day?

Sam advanced on it menacingly. “Hey, act your age!” got her to subside. “You’re not on guard duty now”, I told her.

The verdict was a retrobulbar mass which will probably grow.  And ears that need a good cleanout.

Otherwise she’s  in really good nick; happy, healthy appetite, shiny soft coat and good joints for an old duck.

“What a lovely dog”, said the vet Laura and her assistant Nikki, giving her another treat. Sambucca bristled when Laura mentioned she could have a cat scan, A WHAT!?, but then her thick tail signaled enthusiastically that the lab report agreed with the vet report when we all agreed not to do any major surgical heroics.

So she’s had her first home ear washout, four to go.

Sambucca 12yrs (3)

Update: She can hear again! Sometimes.

Belle of the Ball

Again. She’s done this before.

Jess was invited to accompany Lelam to his matric dance at her old alma mater Wendon Academy. Yes, she’d go; No, she wouldn’t; Yes. No. I won’t enjoy it Dad. You’ll love it my girl. Cold feet. But we got going:

We bought a dress.

We used her silver shoes from her own matric dance in 2016, then got (shh! cheap) jewellery and a clutch bag to match them.

Charmaine up the road did her hair.

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Her childhood friend Annabelle did her make-up.

Jess & Annabelle
Jessica & Annabelle

Lelam’s Dad phoned and organised things. He would fetch Jess and take them to the dance. He sounded like a lovely person, but a dark secret cast doubt on that assessment: He is a Michaelhouse Old Boy! I’d be keeping a close eye on him.

Proud Dad Mphathisi and Lelam arrived with a beautiful bunch of roses and a stunning corsage:

They had a lovely evening. We fetched them afterwards.

Wenson Dance Jess Lelam 2018 (15)

They had danced all night; We had eaten, drank and solved the world’s problems all night.

Next morning a beautiful Pearl Charaxes found the single malt dregs:

and a skein of birds flew overhead:

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What a lovely day.