Wake up TomTom, time to get up.
Ah no Dad, just let me finish my dream. OK, but fast forward it, fella.
Five mins later:
Come on, up you get!
It’s about Father Christmas, Dad. Well, to stay on his good side you better get up, my boy.
He LOVES me Dad, I’m his best client!
A letter from an earlier time – dictated to Ma Aitch: