– life – bokdrols of wisdom –
So we did *sometimes* go where the signs *sometimes* said Notice: Maybe You Shouldn’t.
We were rescued by friendly Damara ous in the Namib desert, by feisty ous in tight khaki shorts on Mocambican beaches, and by faithful Bahá’ís at their picnic on the Báb’s birthday on a Malawian beach. Bless em all.
You just gotta have faith ye shall be rescued.
~~oo0oo~~
I first heard about this lovely lodge on Jejane Private Nature Reserve “up towards the Olifants River area” way back last century from Rob, one of the early members. Now at last I got to visit, thanks to Carl and Mandy, co-owners with four other families – all farmers around Harrismith and Bergville.
It was everything I’d imagined and more; we had a lovely stay with game drives, lots of laughter, great meals, lots of beer, sunshine, lots of rain. Carl and I were on our best behaviour as we were outnumbered, Mandy having brought in three young lasses from her distant past to stand by her. All from GHS – Grey-headed Sparrows? Or was it PSGH – Posh School Girls Har? I dunno, don’t quote me. We sensibly didn’t have those kind of schools in the vrystaat. We had schools that you just went to till you were allowed to leave and you didn’t endlessly talk about them for decades afterwards.
Mandy is full of nonsense and I am well-behaved. She told this raucous crowd before I arrived that I was ‘a genius,’ so, having not been taught manners or etiquette at whatever school for ladies it was, they ripped the ring out of that handle. I suffered. Or maybe Miss Manners did try to teach them, but the four of them stuck their fingers in their ears and yelled na na na NA na?
These four cheekily nominated me Airfryer Fundi, pretending they didn’t know what to do with the machine; so I, the least experienced in any kitchen, pushed, pulled and stroked various knobs so they could cook dinner. That seemed to work. Meantime its really just always 180⁰ for 20mins, fullstop.
The rain was lovely – not as hectic as in the Kruger Park next door, which had actually been closed down completely, if briefly. I got out just in time, driving from Berg en Dal camp in the SW corner of the park.
In Jejane, dams and pans that were mud puddles filled rapidly and overflowed. Streams rushed all over, threatening road crossings, but the level would soon drop and the roads remained good as the water soaked into the sand.
Paradise.
~~oo0oo~~
After Jejane I pulled into Waterval Boven on my way back to KwaZulu Natal, to an Inn I had visited years before. This time I had a less eventful stay. Quiet, early to bed.
Actually to Ondangwa, but that doesn’t sing like Tipperary.
So after I’d dug myself out of the hole on the – I now know – Bravo cutline 4X4 trail **, I headed due west past Okongo and Eenhana to Okatope, tiny towns, then south to Ondangwa, big town. A thought: Eenhana must feel so eensaam being in Northern Namibia and not starting with an ‘O.’ Do they apologise for this, I wonder? Like, jammer Oom . .
I was looking for wifi to do emails and banking but no go, so I kept moving, looking for a campground to stay, or a lodge if I had to. Didn’t find any. Drove on and on all the way to Omuthiya where I decided I’d have to reluctantly return to Ondangwa for a better chance of lodging, as the sun was setting, big dark storm clouds loomed and intermittent showers fell. A beautiful 🌈 rainbow shone to the South East.
The clouds got blacker and stormier and lightninger till the heavens opened, my windscreen wipers impotent against le deluge; and then an impressive thunder-crack switched off all the lights in Ondangwa. Taking this as an omen to stop being so stubborn, I tucked my tail between my legs and reluctantly checked into the Protea hotel, getting soaked carrying my stuff in even though I’d parked just ten metres from the door. Ja, ‘strue, this wimp checked into a soulless hotel with his camper parked at the door.
Oh well, hot water, warm bed and, when the lights came back on, wifi.
I was the only person in the large dining room for breakfast the next morning; the food was fine but the mood was ruined. Softly in the background they were playing Jingle Bells. In October. Or maybe it was November, was it? Gave me jingled bowels, it did.
On to Etosha, where wide open plains stretched as far as my eyes could see – literally. To the east there was a low line of trees in the far hazy distance, but to the west the grassland continued uninterrupted to the horizon. Herds of springbok, gemsbok and zebra scattered themselves about so as to look picturesque and Africa-y.
I had a good look around Namutoni camp. My last visit had been in 1986 and my first way back in 1969. The fort looked the same, but I think the camp behind it has grown.
Now my destination was Kakombo farm outside Omaruru, but first this ou had to drive through some more ‘O’s’ – Otavi and Otjivarongo.
~~oo0oo~~
eensaam – lonely; spare
jammer Oom – sorry Oom
Oom – uncle
** from Tracks 4 Africa map – thanks!
images from https://www.etoshanationalpark.org/ – thanks! I forget to take pics sometimes.
‘Middle’ being a middelmannetjie; ‘You’ being four Big Beef Bulls. It was Louis’ fault, of course.
I usually go nowhere slowly, but right now I was in a slight hurry, and I had an actual destination for a change. This hurry relative to my normal pace would slow down my progress, as we’ll see. I had just left the beautiful Cubango river in the pic above, which forms the Angolan border with Namibia. I wanted to meet Louis on his farm Kakombo outside Omaruru in two days time.
Go via Tsumeb, said Louis. No, that’s tar! I protested. Ah, said Louis, I also like the back roads; There is another way. I thought it was a cutline but when I went down it it was fine. The D3600? I asked, looking at my maps.me app. Yes, I think so, said my Local Knowledge Personal Route Advisor, not looking at a map. The one that goes dead straight south for about 130km? Yes, I think so, he said. He didn’t say when he had been down that road; nor what he’d been driving – I now know he drives a macho Namibian 4X4 called toyota (which is a Herero word for ‘rugged’) with wheels like a large John Deere. You know what those ous in khaki are like.
As I turned off the tar I thought ‘piece o’ cake.’ A good sand road. Third gear, 40kmh, smooth and a low middelmannetjie. In the dips it was softer and I’d have to change down to second. There were three surfaces: Reddish sand was firmer; light cream was deeper and the lightest grey sand was the deepest and softest. Keep up the momentum through those hollows, I told my driver. Surprisingly, some stretches were jarringly corrugated under the sand! 4X4 ous blame these corrugations on 2-wheel drive vehicles but 2X4 me tells them the 2X4 forums say 4-wheel drive vehicles are to blame. Luckily, so far none have asked me about those non-existent forums. They’ve just laughed at me. But I’m used to that.
After a few km’s I was thinking Uh Oh! and then soon it was 2nd gear and 30kmh with only occasional 3rd gear and 40kmh; After 50km of Uh Oh! it just got too deep, I lost momentum, slammed into 1st gear, but no go; I came to an abrupt halt. Stuck in the middle.
So I switched off and let rip with a long string of all my swearwords, repeating many of them and searching for the best ones.
Then I stopped to think. And what I thought of was that I was near the Angolan border and they speak Portuguese there, which reminded me of the Portuguese swearwords Abel Luis Aparicio Caixinha had taught me in primary school, ca.1966. So I let rip with those a few times. I thought that might help.
Cleverly, I had got stuck next to a lovely shade tree, so I left the Ford Ranger in the blazing sun and went to stand under the tree to think. I was not alone. Those four Big Beef Bulls I mentioned lay chewing the cud and staring at me thoughtfully through half-closed lids. I could see what they were thinking. They were thinking What A Doos.
What I was thinking is, I’m glad Aitch isn’t here. She’d be asking me innocently – knowing full well that I hadn’t: Did you bring a spade this time? Just because I had got her stuck in deep sand in the Namib desert thirty years ago, she’d assume I hadn’t brought a spade again. Correctly. If I patiently explained – again – But Think of the Weight I Saved, she’d roll her eyes so hard she’d see her occipital cortex. Again.
I thought Better Start Digging, but the shade was cool so I lingered. Me and the bulls were not alone. Each of them had a thousand flies buzzing around their bums and on the bovine crap which covered every inch of shady ground. A few dozen made a beeline straight from those bums to my lips and my Ffff! Phhh! Ffff! and slapping my cap at them startled the bulls, so they jumped up and stared at me through wide-open eyes, thinking What a Doos. Standing, I could see they were fully-qualified bulls, not cows or oxen. I needed visual proof, not being a good farmer.
I’d run out of thoughts and excuses now, so there was nothing else for it: I’d have to dig. I stepped out into the hot African sun and knelt next to the right rear wheel and started digging. Five seconds later I was back under the tree. Damn! that sand was fiercely hot on my bare knees, shins and foot arches!
Once I got a towel to kneel on I did the wheels one by one followed by a break under the tree to cool down. Then I let down each of the tyres to 1.1 bar, again with a shade break. This undid my initial dig so I needed to repeat, but only after digging out the fifth wheel: the spare slung underneath, buried in the middelmannetjie. One more round of digging in the same sequence and I was ready.
Time to fire outa here. I was determined to get out at first attempt. A failed attempt would dig me down towards Australia and I’d be stuck here until someone happened to drift down this lonely road as no-one had all day so far. Taking a deep breath I started off with a 3L turbodiesel roar in first gear and difflock for two metres, slammed into reverse and rocked back six metres, back into first and forward! Into second gear, and keep it up for the 300m to the harder red sand. I was out! Much better with 1.1 pressure, should have done that earlier. Plus removed my spare from under the vehicle!
On the hard stuff I stopped to think. 40 to 50km of known track down, about 80 to 90km of unknown challenge to go. Retreat! A four-point u-turn had me heading back north, exhaust pipe tucked under my bumper, discretion beating valour. Back on the tar I pumped all tyres back up to 2.4, swallowed an ice-cold tonic from my fridge and headed west, past Eenhana, then south to Ondangwa.
My day was far from over, but that story will need another post.
~~oo0oo~~
middelmannetjie – raised hump in the middle of a twin track
ous – men
ous in khaki – real men; hard to see when they stand in front of a khaki background; the background in Namibia is often khaki coloured
Didn’t think to take photos of the stuck Ford Ranger, or the bulls, or the shade tree! Damn! Aitch would have got pictures of my bum as I dug sand with my hands, as she did, here in the Namib, ca. late-1990s. Also in a 2X4, two of the wheels not helping, just nogschlepping.
~~oo0oo~~
Camped at Simanya River Lodge near Nkurunkuru. Quite an operation! Big chalets overlooking the river; Huge convention hall, a chapel, a restaurant. Smart campsites, each with own kitchen and bathroom. Phew! Seems OTT?
In the tree above my camp, a Yellow-bellied Greenbul seemed to be ‘anting’ or ‘de-lousing’ a juvenile Drongo. Even while an adult Drongo looked on. Seemed strange.
Saw a Copper Sunbird pair – LIFER- at the deck in front of Simanya Camp’s convention hall overlooking the wide blue Cubango River – some 100km west of where they’re meant to be found! I rushed to fetch my camera, but they were gone. No evidence! I’ll watch to see if other birders confirm. Mosque Swallows, Bee-eaters. Must find my birdlist (if I made one).
On to Louis’ connection Winni Metzger at Kanyikamma Rest Camp. What an operation Winni and vrou Metzger run! Shops, farming, butchery, a lodge and much more. I stayed in one of their big smart stone chalets.
A Dutch couple on a tandem bicycle arrived. They had cycled from Windhoek to Angola and were on their way to the Caprivi. Sandy roads on a tandem with skinny-ass tyres is not my idea of fun, but they were young, skinny-ass themselves, and full of spirit and can-do! They were looking forward to the tar roads ahead of them.
Southward now – down to Etosha, then on to Omaruru where schoolmate Louis lives on Kakombo farm.
~~oo0oo~~
Lee in Maun had recommended Rainbow River Lodge on the Kavango River near Popa Falls. It was great. Lodge owner Deon was welcoming and helpful. He took me boating to see Carmine Bee-eaters and the beautiful cataracts called Popa Falls.
Twice I drove south to Bwabwata Park, also on the right bank of the Kavango, downstream.
Back at Rainbow, I watched skeins of duck and geese fly downriver; and a mokoro paddle past, from my deckchair.
Hippo, crocs and otters in front of the riverbank campsites, plentiful birdlife. Rainbow Lodge is really worth a visit.
Next I’d be tracking the Kavango river upstream till it becomes the Cubango – the border between Namibia and Angola. I’d be getting my first-ever glimpse of Angola.
~~oo0oo~~
Bridges – I have since found out about all the new bridges that cross the two mighty rivers in the region, where before, ferries did duty.
Across the Cubango/Kavango/Okavango: In Namibia – At Rundu into Angola; At Divundu from Namibia into the Caprivi; In Botswana at Muhambo; I saw these three on my travels and got a distant pic of the Muhambo Bridge’s ‘elephant tusk’ supports looking south from Namibia’s Bwabwata park.
Across the Zambesi – At Katimo Mulilo from Namibia into Zambia; At Kazungula from Botswana into Zambia.
I haven’t driven across any of these. Yet.
I paid and moved on after posing a big challenge to Swamp Stop’s sewerage system. I’d cooked wors, pap, steak and chicken high sosaties and it took two flushes to get rid of it. Did I say cooked? I mean eaten. Cecelia had cooked it. Also potatoes in foil, butternut and a salad. Her broad beam and broad smile had convinced me immediately that her offer of supper would surpass my intended cold baked beans straight outa the tin. And it did, it was delicious. I recommend the meals on offer at Sepupa Swamp Stop! At 200P it was quite expensive, but they have to source it, fetch it, store it, cook it, serve it, so I was happy to pay. No schlep, no washing up and way more variety and quantity that I would have had. Yum!
Two misbehaving teenage fishermen Peter and Ken (ages 75 and 79) were camped next to me the two nights I was there. I tried to get them to behave, but would they listen? Constant gin, beer, wine and tall tales of the bream they were going to catch. Next time. They did catch some fine tigers and barbel, and they poured a good gin, it must be said. But the bream remained promises while I was there.
They told frightening tales of the terrible A35 north road after I had said the road was fine. ‘No it’s not!’ said these drivers of a new Discovery, ‘It’s a nightmare! We couldn’t even go 70 / 75 towing this Conqueror off-road trailer!’ OK, I said, I admit I usually cruise slower than that, and no trailer; So the road was fine for me. Also, I was driving a 2007 Ford Ranger! They made the obligatory groans that all envious okes seem to do when I mention this fact. Always amazes me when Landrover victims think they know about things automotive.
When I left camp after breakfast (Cecelia’s scrambled eggs on toast) I thought, Can 154 Years of Experience be wrong? so I decided to dodge the now dreaded, newly notorious A35 and get to Nxamasere off the grid, taking a sand road parallel and nearer the Okavango’s western-most channel. ‘You can’t go that way!’ they told me in Sepupa village but I read somewhere, “All Roads Lead to Nxamasere,” so I felt confident. I think that’s what it said.
And I was right. It was a magic little bush track, smooth sand mostly, and winding along merrily, scratching my pristine 15yr-old paintwork only occasionally. After an hour I stopped for a pee in the cool shade of a magnificent Knob Thorn.
At times the road did seem to peter swanie out a bit, but it would re-appear, and every now and then blue concrete beacons marked ‘WP’ would appear reassuringly. I thought, If this route goes to Western Province I’m sure it goes through Namibia, and Nxamasere will be en route.
At Kajaja health post two men were building a house right on the road. They gave me a smile and a big wave so I asked them (quickly trying, but failing, to ask them a question that could not be answered ‘YES’).
‘NO,’ they said, You cannot get to Nxamasere this way, you have to take the tar road.’ OK, thanks, I said, I’m sure you’re right, but I am going to try. I’ll see you back here if I fail, to admit to you: You Were Right. They thought that was helluva funny. I started to move off and one said, ‘Wait! Let me ask Our Father.’ I bowed my head and closed my eyes but he meant his earthly father who was sitting on a chair under a shady tree behind the house they were building. ‘Dad!’ he shouted in fluent seTswana, ‘Can one get to Nxamasere this way? There’s an ancient white-haired goat here who is determined not to drive on tar.’ No, said our father, There is no way to Nxamasere that way. ‘Our father says No, there is no way to Nxamasere that way,’ said my man. OK, I said, I’m sure he is right, so I will come back if I get stuck and I will say to him, I admit: You Were Right.
The road meandered on vaguely northwards, maybe a bit more overgrown and a touch less confidently, but on it meandered nevertheless, with an occasional detour and only one bit of gardening needed where a tree had fallen across and needed a bit of branch breaking, a rope and a backward tug to make a gap. It was surrounded by elephant droppings so maybe those pachyderm foresters had felled it. Still a smooth sandy track, no corrugations, hard enough to not deflate my tyres; occasionally a patch of calcrete which made me think maybe this was the old great north road before the A35? Second gear 30kmh; Third gear 40kmh at times.
Then it did peter out. I took a left detour but that turned back towards Kajaja; a right detour went downhill towards the channel and ran into some dongas where lots of sand had been extracted. They call them ‘borrow pits’ – I think that is seTswana for ‘quarry.’
Defeat.
I arrived back in Kajaja with a grin and my men grinned back. Our father waved from under the tree. You Were Right, I said, triggering laughter again, and made my way with my exhaust pipe between my legs to the tar.
And Peter and Ken were right. The A35 tar road was bladdy awful. Smooth; Straight; Wide; Boring.
Even this donkey felt my disappointment, as you can see if you zoom in on his ass. Terrible road.
Onward to Namibia now.
~~oo0oo~~
Up in the northwest of Botswana a magnificent river enters the country. Called the Cubango in Angola, the Kavango in Namibia and the Okavango in Botswana, it’s in the top twelve longest and biggest rivers in Africa. Unusual in that it doesn’t reach the sea. Instead, it discharges into the Kalahari Desert and forms the famous Okavango Delta. I have been into that stunning Delta on numerous occasions, but I had never visited “the panhandle.” Till now.
Swamp Stop is a well-known camp which bills itself as the gateway to the Okavango Delta. It’s up in NW Botswana near Sepupa village, about 50km south of the Namibian border.
The camp has been around since Bobby Wilmot’s days and they know exactly what is needed. They have friendly people, a long shady bar, a lovely deck overlooking the channel, a restaurant providing good grub, two cool pools, chairs and tables under cover and under the trees, and accommodation ranging from comfy chalets to great campsites. And much more, I’m sure. Boats for hire to get into the Delta, for instance.
Drotsky’s Cabins is another well-known stop a bit further north near the bigger town of Shakawe. The campsites are splendid. Huge trees and lots of birds and animals on the riverbank. Including a very horny donkey Jack complaining loudly – and for hours! – that the Jenny of his desires was being mean to him. Meantime, she was just ignoring his bleating horniness.
~~oo0oo~~
Bev said Hop In! so Janet and I hopped into her Prado automatic and glided off smoothly NE to Khwai village, on the border of Botswana’s Moremi Game Reserve. A much smoother ride than my old bakkie, was Bev’s Prado. We were working – we were going to check out a bridge on the river Kwai – I mean a lodge on the river Khwai called The Termite Mound Guest House. “We” meaning Bev – Janet and I were just backup crew. Happy nogschleppers.
We loved the cleverly designed lodge. Two big metal ship containers form the lower outer walls. One is the kitchen and pantry, one is an en-suite bedroom. Impressive Zanzibari doors lead into the lovely open space between them; ideal for dining and lounging al fresco. All the other walls are canvas; the roof is tin with skylights, raised up high on impressive gumpoles. Above the containers, two en-suite bedrooms with their own verandas and wonderful views. Solar power heats the water and powers the batteries that run lights and fridge. Comfortably ‘off the grid.’
Bev is an experienced and accomplished guide who knows the area well, so we drove all along the Khwai and into the fringes of Chobe Game Reserve with her telling us about the various places to stay and camp. The waters of the Okavango spilling into the Kalahari bring life abundant and I remarked in awe as we sat at one lagoon, ‘It’s like an aviary!’ Here’s a partial list I recorded: Great white Egret; Rufous-bellied Heron; Little Egret; Reed Cormorant; Darter; Black Crake; Striated Heron; Black-crowned Night Heron; White-faced Duck; Egyptian Goose; Lilac-breasted Roller; African Fish eagle; African Jacana; and some Lechwe antelope were hanging about.
When we left for home we headed into Moremi Game Reserve, crossing a bridge on the river Khwai:
Good rain had fallen, making some roads tricky, but Bev waded through with panache. We had lunch overlooking a pan. On the way out I said. ‘I’d love to see an Arnot’s Chat again,’ and Bev said ‘There’s one!’ I got a pic – will add it when I find it (done below). Meantime, talking of lunch, here’s a leopard eating an impala, crocs eating a hippo and lions chilling, probly after dinner:
~~oo0oo~~
Out on the Makalamabedi road south of Maun the Boteti river is flowing nicely. Three or four of the pipes have a swift current and the birds are loving it. And I only got two pictures, none of the lovely scene!
. . and then there’s the salubrious suburb of Tsanakona and Janet’s patch there on the right bank of the fascinating Tamalakhane River. Quite one of my favouritest places in the world!
Lee organised his umpteenth trip to the CKGR – the Central Kalahari Game Reserve – and my first! His frequent fellow-travelers Hans and Karina joined him on their annual visit from the Netherlands; as did Dwayne the pilot; he also invited Janet – and me! At last, a trip to a long-desired destination.
We headed east to Makalamabedi, then south along a long cutline to Motsware gate. On to Deception Pan. Kori campsite No.2 I think.
Day trips in Lee and Dwayne’s Toyotas to Owen’s camp for sundowners; Sundays Pan – water pumped; Campsite on dune for brunch – delish; Leopard Pan.
Struggling to get a deckchair back into its bag, Lee says he knows why. At the factory in Australia the worker asks, Where’s This Batch Going? Suffefrica, says the foreman. Right, make the bags 10% smaller, they all shout in unison.
I got a Lifer at Sundays: Barred Wren-warbler
illustration from Newmans app, thanks!
~~oo0oo~~
Zena said We must go to Kruger, my man Martin is a fabulous guide. I said Let’s Go!, and when August rolled round there we were, chilling in the mopane woodlands around Mopani Rest Camp in the famous Kruger National Park, drinking gin and tonic, gazing out over Pioneer dam from our under-thatch bird-watching stoep.
Martin Brasg is an honorary ranger and runs Laughing Hyena Safaris. His experienced Kruger Park nose soon led us to great sightings – big ones, feathered ones and little ones too.
Suddenly! We spotted some spots in the mopane shadows! With great skill we tracked the shadowy spots through the dappled sun and shade of the mopane woodland. What could it be?
Hey, it was! It was a . . a . . leopard! Kruger’s holy grail. With great tracking skill, we had found it:
. . . ‘course, we actually found it the traditional Kruger Park way:
To celebrate we had lots more gin & tonic, which improved our sightings even more:
A keen photographer and Canon ambassador, Martin aimed his long lens out the window and later let us have some of his pics:
. . and he made us a video:
and he taught us a new bird species: the Burchell’s Poupol
~~oo0oo~~
So I decided to sell my home and go mobile, hit the road. Of course, I did some careful research into which mobile home I should buy.
Criteria: 1. No rooftop ladder! See, I have a brain, so you rooftop tent dwellers are OK, but I could get brain damage.
Criteria 2: No rooftop ladder. Those fokkin things can kill you dead! First there’s UP after six beers; then there’s DOWN in the wee hours because of the six beers. Ascent or descent can kill you dead. I need a gentlemanly collapse-into-bed setup.
Criteria 3: Cheap. Well, compared to a house. While searching, you do get tempted! Here’s one that costs about seven times what I just sold my home for!
Criteria 4: Not a trailer. We loved our Bushman Tracker 1 trailer, but been there, done that. If I hadn’t allowed it to rust I coulda saved all this cash n bother, but . . oh well. And anyway, it had a rooftop ladder. See the dangerous angled access to the sleeping loft on the left of this pic.
So how does one make the ascent in the AHA, seeing as it also has the double bed up on the roof? Like this:
Gracious and long-suffering hosts the Brauers kindly allowed me to do a test-pitch / unveiling on their driveway!
Fetching the camper was just the start. The old bakkie got a wobble-hop from the new weight and the diagnosis was new tyres and new shocks.
Rugged kevlar-reinforced off-road tyres; Soothing chamomile shocks for a tranquil ride; This is what they told me. Oh, it’ll be worth it, they said. Here we go, the never-ending, “And then just add THIS . . “
When I sent the pic of my new acquisition to Tommy his only comment had nothing to do with my shiny new toy; Just, Cor, Dad! Who’s been feeding you? It was Terry, of course. And I also had to eat Brauer’s vegetable portions.
~~oo0oo~~
Some pictures and a slightly embarrassing confession at the end.
At Marakele, there was no room in the inn. For camping. But they did have a safari tent free. I was forced into Luxury! In Tlope tented camp. A big tent on a raised wooden deck, en-suite bathroom, overlooking the water, mountains as a backdrop. Sometimes you just gotta grin n bear things. Flycatchers – Tit ( fantailed), Pallid
Green Woodhoopoe
Brown-crowned Tchagra
Chats – Buffstreak, Mocking, Familiar, Sickle-wing;
Buntings – Cape bunting, Golden-breasted, Lark-like;
Slender mongoose. Cheetah. Eles. Buffalo. Klipspringer. Rhino square-lipped.
I wrote I’d never heard of Marakele National Park! Then I read my own 2003 blog post: ‘Spent three nights in the Marakele National Park while we waited for our binoculars to be courier’d to Thabazimbi . . ‘
I remembered then a lovely pic we had taken of Jess (5) and Tom (20 months) taking themselves to the ablution block.
. . so I went looking for that ablution block and found it:
~~oo0oo~~
Ancestral home of us Tshwanepoels. We have land rights. We’re biding our time before launching a land claim. As soon as Trump and the Guptas are in gaol, we’ll launch our bid. Meantime, I’m just visiting Chez Brauer in the Gramadoelas for Easter to keep death off the roads without driving on the pavements.
With Terry away that evening I thought I’d better buy food; you know how bachelors are, the fridge would be empty. So I took my Checkers deli ready-cooked booty and went to put it in the fridge. Dorothy had let me in – Brauer was still slaving over a hot autorefractor. Well, when I opened the heavy fridge door, two pounds of butter and three jars of anchovette fell on my toes. The fridge was filled to Terry-pacity. There was two kinds of every delicacy from 140 of the 200 countries of the world in that capacious fridge. I shoved my packet in and quickly slammed the door; only two pawpaws escaped.
Their beautiful kitchen was stocked with alles in wonderland – stuff for Pesach; stuff for Easter; stuff for Passover, Diwali and Lent; bunnies, brightly coloured eggs, marshmallow eggs, designer cubic eggs with dark chocolate (those were yum), and etc. Most of it was, of course, thanks to us pagans, who contribute all the fun stuff to holidays and celebrations. Think about it: The grog! the naked dancing! bonfires! You know that, right? We have Bacchus on our team, I think, don’t we? Probly Venus as well. The Abrahamic religions only contributed guilt and hellfire.
Diwali wasn’t so good; the lights were dim; thanks to Eskom – they switched off. So Brauer kick-started his borrowed generator and hey presto! Except for a bit of bronchitis. The generator would roar, then sigh, then get a death rattle and vrek. Some investigating was needed. We switched off everything we thought would draw a lotta power, but still the sukkel‘ing. Then Terry Sherlock had a thought: She switched off Brauer’s bar fridge. Aha! THAT was the problem, of course. That amount of hooch draws kilowatts. Now we had Peace on Erf.
Terry stopped Sid when he arrived at the top of the stairs. ‘Wait There, I’ll Help You Down,’ she pressed pause. Sid waited obediently while she sorted out a few things in cornucopia. Sid had driven himself in his BMW, he’s fully licenced and experienced in driving since 1948. Having escorted him down the steps, Terry said, ‘Sit. I’ll Make You Tea.’ She reached for the exact spot in the kitchen where, among 467 other items, she knew Sid’s cake was waiting. Silence. Uh, Oh! Confession time! There wasn’t a rat in the house. Well, not a small furry one anyhow. I had scoffed it the day before! I say let them eat . . . whatever Sid got instead.
~~oo0oo~~
gramadoelas – dodgy area with a truck stop and generator right outside the guest bedroom window; residents have corrupted the name to Maroelana to hide the dodgy
pavements – sidewalks
alles – Alice
vrek – go kaput
kaput – go vrek;
vrek – dead
sukkel – battle; suffer; struggle; like bronchitis
erf – earth; plot; erven; yard; peace on erf = domestic bliss
So the streets of Parys, Vrystaat, much like the streets of that other Parys, France, were very interesting if you like shopping and eating on the pavement. I did have a good brekker at the Lekker Bistro, indoors cos it was raining. But then I skipped the shopping to drive the roads to the west. Near Viljoenskroon I saw Simbra bulls for sale and asked Des if I should get him one but no reply yet. He used to live in Viljoenskroon, so I thought the bull would feel at home with him. Update: Mercia says he can’t buy any more bulls. Something about foot-in-mouth. I spose he’s been talking kak again.
Choosing a road less traveled, I headed for Schoemansdrif across the Vaal, but chickened out at this minor stroompie drif which could have been deeper than it looked. As I waited and contemplated how deep was my bakkie, a Landcruiser came past, stopped, then decided to proceed. It sank down to above its big wheels, so I christened this spruit drift Omdraaidrif, made a u-turn and crossed the Vaal instead at Scandinaviadrif which has a high bridge, and gave me a great view of the full river.
Bakubung Lodge was R2400! One person! One night! But it was late, I’d run out of options, so I gritted my teeth. For once I checked that I was getting the Old Goat price and the friendly lady assured me she had not mistaken me for anything younger than ancient. ‘Remember this is for dinner, bed AND breakfast,’ she kindly tried to ease my landing, feeling my pain.
But I’d bought grub in Potchefstroom and the thought of a dining room didn’t appeal – other people, you know? So I ate Cordon Bleu in my comfy room – actually in the bath, up to my chin in hot water. Vetkoek n Mince ala Potch washed down with a vintage merlot. For you label-readers, it was 13,5%, R54 and some change, February. Only 750ml, so not the finest, but complemented the vetkoek well. A delicate nose, bosveld notes.
On to Dinokeng. I dialled a number I found. It was Wim. I was welcome to stay at his place, man; Did I have a tent and a mattress? No? OK, then phone Fanie. He might have a roof and a bed. I did. He did. How does R600 sound? Fanie asked me. I said Fine, baie dankie Fanie, still suffering from the R2400 the night before.
Supper was an avo and a crispy bun from Potch Spar. There was a kettle, and friendly camp manager Bothwell brought me some Ricoffy sachets. On the drive out I saw a bird I couldn’t place. I decided melanistic shaft-tailed whydah. Maybe a world-first. Me and my camera were too slow again.
In Pretoria I finally made my long-awaited visit to AHA camper makers and ordered my piggyback slide-on camper for the old Ford Ranger, paid my deposit and was told: Come back on the 11th May.
Now Easter weekend loomed and I remembered another time I had almost got caught out by Easter. I headed for comfort and luxury. Top-notch accommodation and world-class fare at rock-bottom prices. At 60 Pinball Ave, Gramadoelas, Tshwane. Home of that fine chef and splendid hostess Terry Brauer. Also her husband.
~~oo0oo~~
drif – ford; shallow river crossing
Omdraaaidrif – u-turn ford; the Ford u-turned
