City Boys

So Devan and Lungelo are staying over for the night. Devan was just visiting, but when his young blonde divorced Mom came to fetch him the trio convinced her it would be SO UNFAIR if he couldn’t also spend the night.

Him being rather pale he was noticeably pink as they’d been in the pool all day. Oops. Suntan lotion. Right. Tom & Lungelo not so much. Once Devan’s Ma had left I lined them up and issued each wif a stone – about plum-size.

What now, Dad?

“City slicker wimps need to learn a few basic skills” I drone while I line them up in front of an upended big black dustbin with a white HTH bucket on top. At a distance of four metres they all missed the target by about five metres.

“Seewaddimean?” says Dad. “Take turns and don’t stop till you’ve each hit the bucket five times.”

They loved it. They reckon they’re ready to hunt big game now.


As his classmates were here I called him Thomas, like they do.

‘Dad’ he says, ‘I’m Tommy’.

Suits me.


The pic is Tommy, Lungelo and another pale mate Ryan. Another day, another place, but same year!

Elston Olympics 2013

The little-known 2013 Elston Place Olympic Games was a thing. Games I. Not XVI or XXII. No, I.

Tom earned 2 golds (run & soccer ball); Lungelo earned 2 golds (swim & cycle) ; One event was drawn (stone throw); Therefore they ended up Equal Olympic Champs!

– the offical Olympic Timekeeper’s station – with those stones visible –

The Games started officially with four Olympians; then one competitor DNF and one withdrew to go home for lunch.


Stone throwing was interesting. I found ten smooth, small-egg-sized stones in Aitch’s stuff. She had lots and lots of all sizes. I upended an outside black bin and placed an empty 10kg HTH bucket on it, also upended. I placed this target about 8m from a walkway so there’d be no encroaching – there was a clear place to stand. I then gooi’d five stones at the HTH bucket and hit it five times. I did grow up in Herriesmif and gooi’ing fings wif a stone was a fing, I’ll admit.

Tom stepped up; Five throws, five misses. Some by a puzzling large margin. Lungelo sniggered, stepped up: Five throws five misses. Some quite literally by about 4m at 8m distance! I had to give frowing fings wif a stone lessons before they started hitting the bucket occasionally! Bloody mis-spent youth they had, it would appear!


Terry Brauer wrote Feb 2013: This so reminds me of Pinaster Street Olympics, FA cup finals – cricket, soccer, tennis, ad nauseum – Ryan and Deon!!


gooi – frow

frow – throw